Has the Sexual Revolution Been Good for Women? (Not) Sure

I just read 2 interesting (and contradicting) articles. They are from online.wjs.com and titled ‘Has the Sexual Revolution Been Good for Women? Yes’ and ‘Has the Sexual Revolution Been Good for Women? No’. Both were written by different women. The Yes one was from Ann Patchett and the No one was from Mary Eberstadt. I think both have some points that we should consider and some other that I don’t really agree with. Let’s take a look one by one.

Myth No. 1: The “war on women” consists of tyrannical men arrayed against oppressed but pluckily united women.

In the first place, womankind, bless her fickle heart, is not exactly united on…anything.

Public opinion polls show women to be roughly evenly divided on the question of abortion. This same diversity of opinion was also manifest in the arguments over the proposed new federal mandate forcing employers to pay for birth control, including abortifacients.

Women never united in anything? Well, damn true and not news. We already saw this kind of tendency even from the first time we enter school. Elementary? Junior High School? High School? College? Work? We just never become truly one. Even in the case that women become the victim. I guess that’s just part of our nature. Hahaha. However, we also has another nature, which is empathy & loyalty (sometimes in our own way).

Let us so empower the young women in our communities with the excellent education that is available to them, the love and support of their families, and the abundance of positive role models, that they are strong enough within themselves to wait until they feel fully ready to have sex with a person they trust, a person who values them. And let the young men of our communities benefit from that same education, that same love. To make things easier, let’s remove several million degrading images of women that can give a boy the wrong ideas about the value of other people.

Education is always a good thing in this sexual revolution. Some might say that high educated with high income become choosy in partner and thus end up not marriage. Well, towards the decline of the Qing Dynasty at the end of the 19th century, Chinese women were considered a negative influence on their own children because they were uneducated and superstitious. In an attempt to strengthen the nation, Chinese intellectuals during the first half of the 20th century championed the idea that a stable home space meant a stable nation, and began a movement to train women for their jobs and responsibilities as household managers. The home came to be seen as a small-scale model of the imperial order of society, and its management became central to national concern. (http://www.salon.com/2012/03/12/all_the_shengnu_ladies/singleton/) So, no matter what, education will still be a positive thing. If then we have, what some may call, too high standard,  well… it will not be far different from men’s standard since the ancient time.

In severing sex from procreation, humankind set into motion forces that have by now shaped and reshaped almost every aspect of life in the Western world. Families are smaller, birthrates have dropped, divorce and out-of-wedlock births have soared. Demography has now even started to work against the modern welfare state, which has become harder to sustain as fewer children have been produced to replace aging parents.

I think it’s true that birth control is one of the things that become a great factor in the sexual revolution. And it does has good and bad effect. One of them is by having smaller family, dropping number of people, and so on, women got more attention. People started to see how we actually can do what men can do and the industry started to think how to use this opportunity. I’m not saying that sexual revolution is completely a product of industry, but we can’t deny it certainly has a great deal of influence. Then the company and university also allowed us to join because they need us. After that came also many other changes.

In the end my conclusion is the same with this article title, Not Sure. However I still think the revolution is needed. We, as a human being has a nature to change. We always evolve in physical, mind, and moral state. Evolve here, I think is not always become better. Human changes to adapt with the environment. And as the globalization emerges to almost everywhere, we have to change. That is what I think of revolution. Industrial Revolution did not make everything better, same with revolution from Orde Lama to Orde Baru, and now until Orde Revormasi. However it’s true that from time to time, there’s some which is better and some which is not and then we have to deal with all of them. In the end, human always have to accept the change and live with it (like what Ann Patchett said, by choosing which is good enough to be kept and which is not to be put some distant). We all, after all, have the ability to choose between good and bad, at least for ourselves.

Oh, here’s the articles:

‘Has the Sexual Revolution Been Good for Women? No’ :



‘Has the Sexual Revolution Been Good for Women? Yes’ :



When you want to cry but couldn’t

I just working on one of my assignment which is listening to lots of songs from different genre and then make a report about what I feel when I listen to each of those songs. One that I picked up is The Lion King – Circle of Life (Broadway Version). What surprise me was, when I got into the song, some tears fell from my eyes. And I didn’t feel like want to stop it (not that lot’s of tears fell, but still…). I guess the song really reminded me of the beauty of nature and why we should be thankful for it, the regret of what earth has become today, and what had I done to make it good or worse…

Here’s the video on YouTube

Then I also remember one time in the past when I couldn’t cry. Couple of years before I had this problem, sometimes I even had to search for something to make me cry. At first any sad books or movie would do, but then the only thing that work is a manga CANON by Chika Shiomi. I don’t know why this book, but my mind seems to respond more to this one; and even in the end I had to read with concentrate and told myself to cry before it succeed.

This, I have to say can be seen as a torture to for me. Because there’s  a time when I just needed to cry and I couldn’t. So now after I doesn’t have this problem anymore (it was kind of reversed actually, now I kind of easy to cry. If I watch, or read, or hear something touchful, I often have an urge to cry), I have different point of view with some people who think/see tears as a sign of weakness. Now I always glad when I still can cry, I think it’s a gift that makes me feel normal and human. And I think someone who cry sometimes braver and stronger than someone who’s not. crying means we are brave enough to not only feel but also show the emotion. Stronger because through showing the emotion we can endure more. We doesn’t have to put all inside and thus we can store more without have to be overwhelmed…

That’s what I think. But I would like to know what all of you think about it. Do you feel the same with me? Or just the opposite?

American Idol vs XFactor

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As we all know, Coca Cola (Coke) with Pepsi are like mortal enemy. They constantly compete with each other and for me, sometimes the competitions are not that ‘healthy’. I think these two programs are the new (or not so new) form of they way to proof who is better. It’s been a long time since the first time I watch American Idol, and I have to say that I always like it. And my favorite is actually the last season with Scotty Mccreery as the winner. That season not only had lots of people with big potential, but they were also interesting and make me want to watch them again and again.

Then, soon after that season ended, at the channel appear new program which is the XFactor that sponsored by Pepsi. Ok, I think I have to tell you first that I live in Indonesia and that is the first time XFactor appeared on our TV (the channel is CTCchannel). Well, unfortunately I hate it even at the first time I saw the logo; not that I prefer Coke to Pepsi coz I hate soda anyway; it just that XFactor give me some uneasy feeling. The colors they chose, the image they tried to show, the way they did the show, and most importantly, the timing. All of them seems so wrong to me. I think it because they appeared soon after my fav American Idol’s season ended and it felt like some copycat suddenly appear after a program become success (I know that might not be the case since they need lots of preparation in making XFactor itself).

As for the image they try to show the audience, it bother me as much as the timing (maybe because of the timing that the image become that disturbing). They are trying so hard to show how elite they are, up until they point that they seems unreachable for me. They use the helicopter, lavish car, etc and they told the judges to came out like a super proud person that sometimes become more boastful for me. The host they chose also has ‘rich & aristocrat’ look not to mention the British accent too. Not that American Idol not selling the ‘rich’ thing, but they are not doing it too much up until to the point I hate it.

But I have to admit that XFactor have a unique way of judging and choosing the contestants. I like how they are not only accept soloist, but also group and dancer (though I would prefer different program for dancer and musician). Then there are also the mentoring by the judges themselves that make the judges interact more with the contestant. At those point, they beat American Idol.

However, I hate their stage. From what I saw, the size of the stage is not much different from American Idol’s but the decoration and the shape makes the performers seems so small and disappear. And certainly the main attraction of the stage is the big X behind, not the performers, that’s why most of the time I have problem with trying to keep my attention on them not the X. Beside that, the lamp also very very disturbing. I have no idea how people who watch at the place cope with that much light that even blinding TV watcher’s eyes. And that’s not helping the audience to pay attention to the performers as well.

And I complain so much about XFactor’s stage because I always love American Idol’s stage. They decorate it very beautiful but not taking the attention from the singer. Rather, it support them. They can give the necessary mood that make the audience feel like included in the performance. I give two tombs up for them. Maybe they color they chose is the main reason for all of that. The blue of American Idol give calm & comfortable feeling that help the audience enjoy all kind of performances. But the red of XFactor demand too much attentions that were supposed to be given to the performances.

I have no problem with the contestant itself, because both American Idol & XFactor able to find some good performers. And I can only hope they found they career there. :))